Thursday, August 09, 2007

Just another day......

As I said yesterday I am feeling down. My Husband came home yesterday and held me for what seemed an eternity, He spoke gentle words in my ear and told me not to worry things always have a way of working out. I would like to trust in what he says but I am overwhelmed by even the smallest thought of them leaving. I cooked dinner, nothing special, as no one was really very hungry...... Georg was in the kitchen finishing the salad when he just lost it and went to the door and said I'll be back. I sat in silence and thought myself a nut for spelling out "Bella" with rice(Yes I am crazy!) I know that some may think that things will be OK and that they will come for visits. I found out that they are giving up their car too so I don't see any visits anytime soon..... So anyways, Georg came back within the hour and said Well, Our Daughter Knows what I think and She also knows what this is doing to you finally.....
My Husband tries to stay out of the kids personal business, Unlike me of course.......
He wanted to hear it from Jessica and why she felt doing something so drastic was necessary since neither one of them had even sought employment since Roberts losing his job, they had jumped on what seemed the easiest solution. Since they would be moving to a even larger city with larger crime and even higher rent prices, His (Roberts Mother) says Oh the rent is way cheaper there but I wonder what part of town she lives in, I know that sounds no nice but I don't care I want my Grand Daughter as well as my Daughter in a lower crime district. YES,we pay out the wazoo for living in Palm Coast, 850.00 a month, But there is such a low crime rate here it makes it worth it. Of course My oldest Daughter Erin doesn't think we pay that much but then some may argue. Her rent is 830.00 and she has a 1 bedroom apartment that is tiny! and the crime rate is high to boot!
I was always very close to my Grand Parents and I wanted Bella to be that close to us, With them moving I don't see that happening. But even my Sister says to be patient things will not work out! She doesn't understand how much of her Momma Jessica has in her LOL ... I am bull headed and If I think I'm right, you might as well paint your face blue because I won't give in.....
OK so anyway, Georg said Jessica was a lost little girl right now as she truly didn't think that this would bother me as much as it is. But her Dad told her just how bad I was taking it and maybe she needed to tell us how bad things were rather than lying to us and letting us think things were OK when they weren't! And as far as Robert goes, He should be working NO MATTER WHERE OR WHAT! Jesse didn't know what to say except that she did feel that this wasn't thought out well enough.
All in all, Georg was just trying to tell her that in the end, no matter what she did that we love her and will always be there for her and for Bella. It breaks my heart to say it but if she leaves there is nothing I can do except smile and wish them the best, while I'll be hurting so badly and pretending it's just another day...........
Peace!

1 comment:

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